Here
are excerpts from Dr. Bittner's
original website....and some rather sarcastic, but honest, comments from
me.
PAGE/SECTION
HEADINGS FROM SITE *** Actual text from site page *** (MY COMMENTS)
The statements below were copied and pasted directly from the website in March, 2008. Interestingly, since this site was published, the doctor's site has had some changes and updates. Some employees who have done surgery in the past are now excluded from the "surgery team" and some statements have been altered.
HOME
PAGE:
We specialize solely in micro-liposculpture procedures that give
our patients smooth, precise and permanent results. (DOES
THIS LOOK SMOOTH AND PRECISE?)
Our world renowned team approach means that you will have multiple specialists dedicated to giving you the best possible outcome. Our advanced technique is gentle and removes just as much fat as traditional liposuction — but with almost no downtime.
ABOUT
LIPOSCULPTURE:
After years of experience with various cosmetic procedures,
Dr. Bittner founded Beverly Hills Liposculpture and personally trained
his team of specialists to focus solely on liposculpture
—
The procedure is quiet and the movements are gentle and
slow.(SOOOO NOT TRUE!) Some patients say it reminds them
of a massage. ( YOU MUST BE KIDDING!) Generally, liposculpture is
not painful and does not leave any unsightly scars. (NOT SLOW, NOT
GENTLE—FAST AND ROUGH, SO ROUGH THAT MY RESPONSE TO IT PROMPTED
THEM TO OFFER FURTHER MEDICATION!)
His highly trained team is committed to excellence and personalized
care for each patient. (HEAVEN HELP US IF THIS CARE WAS
"EXCELLENT"!)
Dr. Bittner prides himself on having the happiest and most
satisfied patients in any medical practice and he has not
ever had a patient experience a serious complication or infection.(
I AM MOST CERTAINLY NOT HAPPY!)
All liposculpture patients are entirely awake and require
only local skin numbing. (SO VERY NOT TRUE! I WAS NOT AWAKE AND WAS GIVEN THREE DOSES OF ORAL MEDICATION AND NITROUS) Patients remain comfortable and enjoy talking to Dr. Bittner and his team,
listening to music, and watching their bodies become sculpted. (I
WAS NOT AWAKE NOR WAS I COMFORTABLE! WHILE AWAKE I DID NOT TALK
TO BITTNER...HE WAS NOT THERE!)
Depending on the patient's individual needs, liposculpture can remove
very small to very large amounts of fat and the delicate technique can carefully sculpt the body, consistently
achieving smooth and even results. (WHO ARE YOU KIDDING?
LOOK AT MY PICTURES!)
Dr. Bittner encourages all patients return for a 6 month follow
up, but follow up appointments are not required. Our office prioritizes prior patients (BY REFUSING APPOINTMENTS?)
and has an open door policy for any returning patient
wanting a follow up or simply to be checked for healthy healing.
Appointments ensure that you will be seen quickly, but any patient
who has been treated can stop by during office hours without a prior
appointment and meet with Dr. Bittner or his staff and have any
questions or concerns addressed. (I CALLED AT 5 MONTHS AND ASKED
FOR FOLLOW UP BECAUSE I HAD AREAS THAT NEEDED REVISION. I WAS TOLD
THAT THE DOCTOR ABSOLUTELY WOULD NOT SEE ME UNTIL SIX MONTHS..STEPHANIE
BECAME RATHER NASTY WHEN I TOLD HER THAT THERE WERE PROBLEMS I WANTED
TO CORRECT)
TEAM:
Our team assists Dr. Bittner in all aspects of your procedure, especially
in determining the proper proportions for your body and keeping
you comfortable and informed. (TEAM ASSISTED IN NOTHING BUT CONSULTATION
PRIOR TO…WERE NOT INVOLVED IN DISCUSSING PROCEDURE----BUT WERE LEFT TO DO PROCEDURE.....FURTHERMORE,
I WAS TOLD THAT THE DOCTOR WOULD BE DOING MY WORK WHEN I SCHEDULED. THERE WAS NO MENTION OF A TEAM. I WAS NOT AWARE THAT OTHERS WOULD BE DOING THE SURGERY UNTIL IT
ACTUALLY STARTED!)
Every liposculpture procedure will be performed by various members
of our team under Dr. Bittner’s direct supervision (I DID
NOT SEE OR HEAR BITTNER AFTER SURGERY BEGAN….WHILE I WAS AWAKE
THE ASSISTANTS DID ALL WORK)
We have an entire team of trained medical professionals (WHOSE CREDENTIALS ARE NOT POSTED AND VERIFICATION OF SUCH DOES
NOT SEEM TO BE SUPPLIED WHEN PATIENTS REQUEST IT) that solely and
jointly perform this procedure multiple times each day and are focused
on optimizing each patient’s care. Depending on your size
and the number of areas you have treated, one or more members of
our team will assist Dr. Bittner in the performance
of your procedure. (TEAM DID WORK—DID NOT “ASSIST”)
Dr. C. Alan Bittner truly is a micro-liposculpture specialist - it is the only procedure he performs and he is considered an expert
in his field. (BY WHOM?) Dr. Bittner chose to specialize
solely in liposculpture because he believes in
giving his patients excellent body sculpting results
with no unsightly scars and almost no down time. (OR BECAUSE HE
WAS SUED AS A RADIOLOGIST? EXCELLENT? NOT MINE!)
Dr. Bittner has been educated on three continents and is a graduate
of the prestigious Johns Hopkins School of Medicine. He completed
his residency and fellowship at UCLA and Stanford University and
received board certification in 1998. Dr. Bittner has been performing cosmetic surgeries since 1999 (?THIS CONFUSES ME?
ACCORDING TO PUBLISHED NEWS, DR. BITTNER WAS A RADIOLOGIST RUNNING
A CHAIN OF CENTERS AND BEING SUED IN 2003? WAS HE DOING RADIOLOGY AND COSMETIC SURGERY FOR SEVERAL YEARS? WHAT DO
YOU THINK?)and he has treated many celebrities, actors and politicians
from all over the world. (WHO?) Dr. Bittner founded Beverly Hills
Liposculpture on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills, (THERE HAVE BEEN
SUGGESTIONS THAT IT WAS THE SITE OF ONE OF HIS RADIOLOGY CENTERS,
PREVIOUSLY) California as a center of excellence focused solely
on advanced liposuction procedures. (NOTICE THAT HERE NO MENTION HAVE YOU SEEN PMY PICTURES?!)
He is a renowned expert in minimally invasive techniques
Dr. Bittner is a minimally invasive surgeon, called an Interventionalist,
and he is board certified through the American
Board of Medical Specialties (IN WHAT SPECIALTY THAT HAS ANYTHING
TO DO WITH COSMETIC SURGERY?)
FEES:
The liposculpture prices above include the procedure, necessary
medications, recovery supplies, compression garment, follow up appointments
and any potential revision surgery.
ocedure. After 5 months, if Dr. Bittner or his team feel that you are sufficiently healed and the results could be improved with the removal of additional fat, there is no additional charge for revision liposculpture. (5 MONTHS OR 6 MONTHS? I WAS REFUSED AT 5 MONTHS---DOES HE EVER DO REVISIONS UNDER THESE TERMS? MY RESULTS WERE OBVIOUSLY UNEVEN, BUT I WAS REFUSED ANY REVISION.)
ABDOMINAL:
We are committed to making you look as good and feel as
happy about the procedure as possible and we do not charge
for touch up or revision work. (WHY? BECAUSE HE NEVER DOES ANY?)
The need for touch up work is very rare, (NO, IT SEEMS IT IS VERY
COMMON) however if your abdomen or love handles heal unevenly
or you feel that you would benefit from additional fat being removed, please return to our office for a follow up appointment anytime 5 months or longer after your pr
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